NASHVILLE PREDATORS 3-1 DETROIT RED WINGS
If Nashville didn't have enough motivation to put a team on the ropes that has been their measuring stick since entering the NHL 14 years ago, they were clearly sent over the edge by having their ping pong play time taken away.
This recap was going to go one of two ways: A long and extravagant celebration of life, or a hurried mess of anger because I just want to be asleep. On with the bullets.
- A game away from elimination and my playoff beard isn't even in the "Hair" stage yet.
- Congratulations to Ian White on his first body check in five years. And I don't want to alarm anybody but I think he's slowly turning into Josh Brolin.
- The Wings have been playing David Legwand for all these years, and the name is still funny. But now it goes in cycles. Like every 15th mention of "Legwand" is hilarious again. It's like when a full moon happens, if that was childish and at all a logical comparison.
- Guys, quit booing Weber when he touches the puck. He was here for a year, we almost won a Cup, it didn't work out. Let's move on.
- I think the "TODD-BER-TOO-ZEE" chants are 9% because people really like him and 91% just because it's really fun to chant.
- We'll win this series is Babcock makes every necessary adjustment. Every one of those adjustments starts with taking a cattle prod to Johan Franzen's chest.
- Intent to Blow. This completely horseshit and seemingly made-up call happens to a Red Wings opponent. It was a miracle! Oh, what a joyous time to be alive! The sun momentarily rose to splash sunshine on my face. A family of deer walked into my living room to eat bread crumbs from my hand. I called loved ones that I hadn't spoken to in years. And in the middle of a conversation with my great uncle Bob, Nashville bodies become occupied by hockey gods and score the goal anyway. I called Uncle Bob a disgrace to the family and told him I hope Barbaro tramples him for an eternity in hell before hanging up on him.
- Rinne on his knees is as tall as Hudler standing up. Ha.
- And the back-breaker: the 2nd Nashville goal. Can a goal in a tie game be called a back-breaker? I'm trying to. When three guys and a goaltender chase a puck carrier out to Flint and leave the net abandoned, that's pretty unreal. That's going in the "Won't forget that one for a few years" category.
I'm not going to proofread this, eat me.